The Art of the Flirt

Since the dawn of time, human beings have flirted with one another. From heartfelt love poems penned by candlelight to sharing a milkshake at the local diner, we’ve found a million different ways to express that which 3 little words alone don’t seem to do justice: I like you.

All good things take time, and flirting is no exception to that rule – for a flirtation to be successful, you can’t be rushed. Rather than focusing on the outcome, the secret to butterflies and delightful thrills lies in the process itself. When we take our time to establish a real connection with someone through fun conversation, we manage to test the waters of the relationship and discover how we feel about it at the same time.

The Basics

While there’s no step-by-step guide to a perfect flirtation, there are several key principles that greatly enhance the romantic success of an interaction.

Eye contact: Meet someone’s gaze, hold it for a moment before glancing away, then make eye contact again to let them know they’ve caught your attention. A small smile lends this move warmth and invites the other person in for a conversation.

Body language: Lean in when your partner is speaking, keep your arms uncrossed to show that you’re open to them, and mirror their movements to establish a subconscious bond between the two of you.

Open-ended questions: To keep the conversation flowing, ask questions that require more than a simple “yes” or “no” for an answer. Pay close attention to what’s being said, build off the information that you learn, and let it naturally guide the back-and-forth of your interaction.

Kindness: Sincere compliments and good intentions go a long way. When you expect nothing in return and simply aim to make the other person happy, the genuine nature of your gesture can be appreciated without the burden of unspoken expectations.

Humor: Ease tensions by cracking a joke, engaging in banter, or letting yourself laugh at any ensuing awkwardness. When you don’t take yourself or the situation too seriously, you lower the stakes and ensure that all parties involved can have a good time.

Practice makes perfect! Flirting a little here and there in daily life not only helps you hone your social skills but also boosts your confidence, making each new interaction easier than the last.